"Love is the greatest refreshment in life." - Pablo Picasso
Valentine's Day, a day dedicated to love and celebration can sometimes pose unique challenges for folks with ADHD. The combination of forgetfulness, impulsivity, and sensory sensitivities can make this heartfelt occasion a little more overwhelming. However, with understanding, patience, and a touch of creativity, we can make Valentine's Day a wonderful experience for everyone.
So, let's dive into why it can be difficult for individuals with ADHD to remember to celebrate with their partners and explore how we can make this day a source of joy and connection.
1. The ADHD Memory Puzzle:
Remembering special occasions can be a bit of a challenge for individuals with ADHD. The nature of ADHD often involves a struggle with working memory and organization, making it difficult to keep track of dates and events. While this may not reflect a lack of love or thoughtfulness, it can inadvertently create stress or disappointment. Encouraging the use of calendars, alarms/reminders, or a friendly phone call from mom can help alleviate some of this pressure and ensure that Valentine's Day doesn't slip off the radar.
2. Sensory Overload and Emotional Triggers:
Valentine's Day can trigger sensory sensitivities, which are commonly experienced by individuals with ADHD and other disabilities. The bright colors, strong scents, crowded restaurants, or overwhelming displays of affection can sometimes become too much to handle. It's essential to remember that everyone's sensory preferences differ, and it's perfectly okay to opt for a more low-key, low-pressure celebration. Consider creating a cozy atmosphere at home, enjoying a home-cooked meal, or exchanging heartfelt letters instead.
3. The Pressure of Gift-Giving:
Gift-giving, while a beautiful expression of love, can sometimes become a daunting task for ADHDers. The pressure to find the perfect gift, and remember someone's preferences (all in time for Valentine's Day) can feel overwhelming. Encourage open communication with your partner, focusing on experiences rather than material possessions. Planning a fun outing, sharing a favorite activity, or simply cooking together creates memories to last a lifetime.
4. Focus on Emotional Connection:
Instead of solely emphasizing material aspects, let's shift the focus to emotional connection and quality time. I always encourage clients to have an open and honest conversation with their partner before Valentine's Day. Discussing what makes each other feel loved and appreciated can help tailor celebrations to your unique relationship. Remember, it's the thoughtfulness, care, and love shared that truly matter.
Turn the Paige would love to hear from you! Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. How do you navigate Valentine's Day with ADHD? Or being a parent of a kid with ADHD/co-morbid diagnoses. Do you have any tips or stories to share? Let's continue the conversation and support each other on this journey. Remember, your voice and insights are valuable (and we never take your information). Look forward to hearing from you!
Leading with love,
Paige Krug, AACC, CAPP