ADHD: It's not an excuse, it's an explanation
- Paige Herman
- Jan 9
- 3 min read
Updated: Jan 12
New year goals come in loud and fast.
Brains respond slower, shaped by the past.
ADHD isn’t an excuse or a pass.
It explains the how, not the effort you’re asked.
Let's Clear This Up
Every new year brings a familiar pressure.
This is when you are supposed to get it together. Overnight. Preferably with a planner.
More structure.
More follow-through.
Less tolerance for struggle.
For people with ADHD, January can feel like walking into a room where everyone else got a rulebook you never received.
So let’s clear this up right away:
And that distinction matters.
Read that again.
What ADHD is Actually Explaining
When ADHD gets dismissed as an excuse, the assumption is usually about effort. That if you just tried harder, this would stop being hard.
But ADHD has never been about not caring. You already care. Often a lot.
ADHD affects how the brain manages attention, time, emotion, and energy. These are executive
functioning skills. When they are taxed, the struggle shows up even when motivation is high.
That is why you can care deeply about your job and still avoid emails you have rewritten in your head seventeen times.
Why a student can want to succeed and still freeze when assignments pile up.
Why reminders, pressure, and consequences often miss the mark.
Without an explanation, people turn inward.
They blame themselves.
They try harder in ways that do not work.
Shame fills the gap where understanding should be.
And shame does not create change. It creates paralysis.
Why ADHD Feels Louder in January
January stacks demands quickly.
New schedules.
New expectations.
Less flexibility.
For many ADHD brains, this isn’t motivating. It’s overwhelming.
Add urgency, comparison, and the pressure to “start fresh,” and suddenly everything feels louder than it needs to be. Even the calendar.
Understanding ADHD as an explanation allows for realistic expectations.
Not lower expectations.
Aligned ones.
That shift alone can change how the year begins.
Explanation Is Not a Free Pass
This part really matters.
An explanation does not mean nothing is required. It means we stop asking the wrong questions.
There’s a phrase I refer to often is:
No one wants to be stuck. No one wants to miss deadlines, avoid emails, or feel like they are constantly falling short. People do not choose stress, embarrassment, or shame as a lifestyle.
When something isn’t happening, it’s rarely because someone doesn’t care. It’s usually because something is getting in the way. Capacity, regulation, clarity, safety.
ADHD helps explain the gap between intention and execution — not to remove responsibility, but to point us toward what actually needs support.
Instead of “Why aren’t you doing this?”
A better question is “What part of this is actually hard right now?”
Is it getting started.
Is it knowing where to begin.
Is it fear of doing it wrong.
Is it managing time once momentum fades.
When we understand the barrier, we can support the skill. That is how responsibility becomes achievable instead of punishing.
What Support Can Look Like
Support might mean breaking tasks into safer entry points - like micro-tasks.
Creating structure outside the brain instead of relying on willpower.
Writing things down because your brain is not meant to hold everything.
Allowing progress to be uneven while systems rebuild.
This is not lowering the bar.
It is finally using the right tools.
Support does not remove accountability.
It makes success possible.
A Better Way to Start the Year
If you are starting this year already feeling behind, pause here for a second.
You are not lazy.
You are not broken.
You are not failing January.
You are navigating ADHD in a world that often expects one way of functioning and rarely explains the rules.
ADHD is not an excuse for not caring. It is an explanation for why caring takes more energy.
And starting the year with that understanding is not a shortcut.
It is the foundation for real, sustainable change.
Understanding comes before change.
Talk soon,
Paige
Any questions, comments, or concerns after reading the blog post? Click the button to reach out even if it's just to chat for a few minutes. I'm here!
Paige Krug is a certified ADHD/Executive Function Coach and Neurodivergent Educational Advocate from Chicago’s North Shore. Drawing on her background as a Learning Behavior Specialist, she works with clients of all ages, with a special focus on helping students understand how their brains work so they can build systems that support focus, confidence, and emotional well-being. Paige’s approach combines neuroscience and practical strategy to create a collaborative, supportive space where every unique mind can thrive.
